"Oh, my God! I sound just like my Mom!" Or dad, whatever the case may be. Has that thought ever struck you and knocked you down? Or is that something that renders a sense of pride in your heart? As we are now a few weeks past Mother's Day, and Father's Day is quickly approaching, we may find ourselves thinking more of our parents and how we were raised. How about our own children and what kind of job we are doing with them? How did you come to be a parent? Are you living up to your own expectations? Are you living up to your children's? Are you a "too many cooks" kind of person or an "it takes a village" kind of person? Do you follow a philosophy like free range parenting or strict parenting or are you a fly by the seat of your pants kind of parent?
I feel that parenting is one of those personal choices that people have to make together. Well, hopefully together. But there are some common threads we can all relate to. Most all kids eat a bug or dirt at some point in time. All kids are going to potty train, lie, make a mess, argue, and do a thousand other things that crawl under your skin. It's what you do about it that makes you a good parent. Likewise, children are capable of great things. They love and understand and give back more than any other adult ever will. Again, it's what you do with it that makes you a good parent.
I can't lie to you. Sometimes being a mom has been horrible. I am never anxiously awaiting the next stomach flu to make a surprise visit to our house. There are some packages you don't want to open. Trust me. Illnesses around my house have been made all the worse because I have a mother in law who lives with me who went through nurses training about a hundred years ago and likes to tell me how to care for my sick kids. But she, too, is a mom. And don't all moms know best? And darn it all if she isn't right some of the time. Plus, it can never just be one kid that gets sick. If you have more than one kid, you know what I'm talking about. A virus will start off with one child then work its way through all the kids until it has morphed into a super bug and attacks the adults in the house. Maybe even the dog and the parakeets. In fact, I'm pretty sure that's how my fish died.
And there's no point in trying to keep a clean house (can I get an A-men?). I will keep my house sanitary and livable. But until these guys learn that shoes do not know how to walk themselves, I am not spending my days not getting paid to be a maid. In fact, I'm pretty sure the whole reason I had kids was to help me clean the house. Of course you can't trust them with cleaners. They'll just make you worry while you're trying to enjoy that mimosa on the couch.
Speaking of worry, have you ever just stayed up watching your baby sleep? Or spied on your kids while they played outside? Or screened their friends before they had sleepovers? Or checked the temperature of their bath water? Blown on their food? Double checked their seat belt? Installed hidden cameras throughout your house and yard? Or any number of things meant to keep them safe and out of harm's way? When does that stop? Granted, my children are old enough to buckle their seat belts and blow on their own food and play outside alone now, but when do we ever stop worrying? Probably about the same time you stop caring. Never.
I love being a mom. Wouldn't trade it for anything. And I firmly believe that my kids are the most talented, funniest, most thoughtful, brilliant, caring, and wonderful children there ever were. But I am far from perfect. I have tried to keep the magic in their childhood as long as possible, but I have made some mistakes along the way. For instance, why did the Tooth Fairy accidentally drop the tooth on top of my dresser instead of carting it off to make Tooth Fairy castles or new baby teeth or Tooth Fairy cocaine or whatever it is Tooth Fairies do with teeth? Our Tooth Fairy is also notorious for forgetting to pick up lost teeth for three days in a row. She should be fired. Seriously. And why does Santa Claus go shopping in department stores? And why doesn't the Easter Bunny take the empty candy packages away? He is a litter bug and leaves them in my house to throw away.
The only other bad thing I can say about parenting also comes with a good thing. I hate having to punish my kids. But if I don't do it, who will? I want them to be responsible, considerate, and conscientious human beings. Not turds with no manners or morals who would rather be lazy and uneducated than productive and motivated. And though sometimes I feel that we are too strict or that sometimes our standards are too high, they always come to understand the punishment. And they still love us. We can still love and laugh and play.
That is the point in my family. Love, laughter and play time. And we have plenty of it.
The Verdict:
I give parenting 5/5 rattles. It's not for everyone, but I commend those that want it, do it and did it well. And those of you raising lazy ne'er do wells, don't worry; we're all talking about you behind your back.
Don't worry that children never listen to you; worry that they are always watching you. ~Robert Fulghum
If you have never been hated by your child you have never been a parent. ~Bette Davis
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